I wish I hadn’t done that…
- Why did I do that?
- I can’t even imagine that I did that.
- If I had done something instead, everything would be fine now.
Do you find these phrases familiar? Probably yes. We say these words when we believe we could be better than we behaved, and this kind of talking is how most people think when they regret something.
Why do we regret it?
Over time, your brain will gradually forget about all the emotional, spiritual, and economic circumstances you had at that moment, and the only thing you will regret is that you will remember: “Why didn’t I do that or what did I do that?!” Humans do their best at any given moment, depending on the moment’s circumstances, and this is a proven principle and fundamental.
The moment you regret it, you made that decision based on the spiritual, sensory, economic, living conditions, events, and books and knowledge you had in mind until then. Even if you go back to that moment and everything comes back to the exact moment, you will do the same thing ten thousand more times. Because you are exactly like a computer that gives output at any time according to the inputs given to it, and Because the resources and information are the same, you will do the same thing again as you go to that moment and the conditions.
Don’t blame yourself; you couldn’t have done better.
What you don’t know about regret is that you usually regret where you wouldn’t be able to do anything else at that moment, even if you had another chance.
When you did, you weren’t sure what the consequences would be, but after doing it and getting bad results, you started to regret it. When you did that, you didn’t know you would regret it later. And that’s something you’ve forgotten over time.
If you are in the same situation a hundred thousand times, you will behave the same because your mental resources are stable in the same way as in the past.
Mental resources
By “mental resources,” we mean your mental ability at that moment, the ability to think, and all the variables involved in your decision-making.
When emotions control you, you will not be able to access all of your mental resources.
When a certain feeling controls you, you have very little access to the resources of your mind, and you only have access to a small part of your mind’s capacity.
Some criminals say, “I can’t believe I did this.” They cannot believe it because they are judging the past, while at the time of the crime, they did not have full access to their mental resources due to emotions such as anger and hatred or revenge.
You do your best at any moment.
We don’t mean to do whatever you like and then say, “I couldn’t do better than that,” but we suggest you do your best to do the best, but if you do something that You don’t like right now, don’t regret it. Because if you did it at that moment, it was because of the resources available (the books you read, your level of consciousness, your economic, spiritual, living conditions, etc.).
You need to know that you can’t do better with the resources you have right now because, at any given moment, you’re always doing what you think is right, given the resources and circumstances of the moment.
Develop a practical plan that will save you from regret
When something makes you sad, design a practical plan reassuring your subconscious mind. Suppose you are rejected in a job interview. In such cases, your brain needs to reassure your program to eliminate the sad feeling.
By thinking about other opportunities (such as getting into another job), writing them down, and planning, you will be able to dispel that feeling of regret. If your subconscious mind believes that there is another way, you will get rid of the sense of guilt and feel better.
How do I control my Emotions? How do I manage my Stress? – ONEEYE
